https://youtubetranscript.com/?v=LGuqEGUIp3g

You can have what you want and need Assuming you’re taking care of yourself, right? Assuming that you’re you’re starting out with the proper attitude towards yourself which is that you’re worthy of care and Respect and and there’s something to you that that’s valuable that at least could be developed You need to give yourself that amount of credit like like you would with anyone that you might Be willing to attempt to care for and love and then the next Question is alright, you can have what you want, but you have to specify it What would you like from your friends three to five years down the road? What would you like your friendship network to look like? What would you like to do? Well, how would you like your career to to shape itself? How are you going to take care of your family your your and then what about children and a and a and a long-term? Mate wife or husband What are you going to do with your time outside of work? That’s useful and engaging and meaningful and productive How are you going to take care of yourself mentally and physically and how are you going to withstand? Temptation so that it doesn’t take you down in the particular way that temptation might take you down And so you’re asked to write a few sentences Not to be obsessive about it, but to sketch it out like a bad first draft You know and then you’re asked to write for 15 minutes. It’s like, okay It’s three to five years down the road and you have what you need and want to make your life What it needs to be? So that you can be a good person in the face of the suffering of life What does it look like and? Then we ask people to do the contrary which I think is also useful which is alright. Well consider for a moment your the multitude of your faults and The direction those faults could pull you in and everyone knows that everyone has a sense of how they would fall apart in their own Particular manner with their own particular weaknesses It’s it’s three to five years down the road and you’ve let that part of your character dominate what? Particular corner of hell is it that you’re now occupying and so now you have Something to aim at you have a purpose right and and that that’s motivating people need a purpose in life it It you need a purpose neurochemically because without a purpose you don’t feel any positive motivation or any positive emotion Like our positive emotion is linked to our pursuit of valuable goals That’s how our brains are are are set up and and so you need that that positive goal and also to start You for being unduly uncertain and anxious because nothing is specified enough, and you need something to run away from and so you can run away from the worst in you you can escape from the worst in you and you can Move towards the best in you and and then we have people write out a strategic plan for the accomplishment of their of their goals It’s called the future authoring program by the way It’s available online at a site called self authoring.com and we’ve we’ve tried it with thousands of university students now and It’s had a remarkable effect on their retention The effect is approximately 25 percent we decrease dropout by 25 percent and it seems to be most effective for the most disaffected students so it works better for men Because women are outperforming men academically and it actually works better for men Non-Western ethnic minority men Having a tremendous impact on their likelihood of staying in university and also on their grades