https://youtubetranscript.com/?v=oDAfTxPM9FU
My wife and I came to see you for our honeymoon, and I’m going to be a dad. Sounds like a successful honeymoon. What are the top three rules rules for being the best man I can be for the people I love? Well, you know, rule number one is, ask that question. That’s a good question. You know, that’s a that’s a meditative and prayerful question. You know, I don’t think there’s any difference, by the way, between prayer and thought. I think that thought is secularized prayer. I think that’s even true, like, evolutionarily and historically. And then the question is, what is prayer and by implication thought? And that is the opening up of yourself to revelation and then the critical analysis of the revelation. And so what do I mean by that? I mean, when you think you admit your ignorance, because why think if you’re not ignorant? And you note that you have a problem and you. Formalize the problem, which is to ask the question associated with the problem, and then you. Open yourself up for receipt of an answer. It’s really important to get the question right. There is rule the first rule, get the question right. That’s a pretty good question. That question is, how do I how am I the best father and husband? In relationship to those I love, and then that has to be a question. And then you can ask yourself, think, OK, well, you know, well, how would have I liked my father to have conducted himself? And how did fathers that I knew that I admired conduct themselves? And how did great men in history who would be models for fathers conduct themselves? And what is the eternal spirit of the redeeming father? Those are all the same question at different levels of depth. And if you ask yourself that question. You’ll stumble towards a revelation of the answer. And then it’s incumbent on you to embody that, tacked it out. You could ask a different question. What stupid things am I doing that I could stop doing that I would stop doing both that I could stop doing that I would stop doing that are interfering with me being that? And man, that’s a great question to ask yourself every morning. You know, what stupid thing am I doing that I could quit doing? That I would quit doing because those aren’t the same thing. Because, you know, there’s stupid things that you’re doing that you’re just not going to quit doing because you like them. But there might be something on the edge there where weak and useless as you are, you could you could stop that. And, you know, part of the reason I wrote this one rule here, the first book, I think it was. No, no, it must be in the second book. Tell the truth or at least don’t lie. Well, why did I formulate it like that? It’s like, well, you can’t tell the truth because like, what the hell do you know? But but some of the things you say are lies and you know it and some of the lies that you tell, you could just stop telling. Well, start with that. You know, incrementally, you know, incrementally, you know, incrementally, you know, start with that. You know, incremental, incremental death and regrowth, incremental death and rebirth. And you let the lies die and you let something new emerge instead, right? That’s the resurrection. So you let the spirit of deceit perish and you let the eternal spirit of redemption arise in its place. And that’s really good for you. And it’s really good for your wife. It’ll spice up your sex life like mad. And because she’ll actually want to have you around. And that’s kind of useful if you’re trying to seduce someone. Even your wife, who you might think is otherwise obligated, and perhaps she is, but I don’t know how much fun that is. Obligatory sex. It’s like. That’s not a very good idea. And it’ll be really good for your kids. And maybe you’re there’s enough to you so that it won’t just be good for you and your wife and your kids, but maybe it’ll be good for your friends and then maybe for your community. And who knows what would happen if you really got your act together? You know, like there is this weird idea that’s central to our culture that because we’re all of divine value, that we have the spark of God himself within us. And but we don’t allow that to make itself manifest because we lack the courage and the faith. And yeah, I think that’s exactly right. And so it’s an open question, you know, if we if you as a father decided you were going to let your take the bushel off your light and. That’d be great for your kids, you know, and one of the things you got to understand about your kids, this is really worth knowing. Your kids want to have the best relationship with you. That they possibly could have like they’re 100% on board with that idea way more than anyone you’ve ever met in your life. And that means you could have the best relationship with your children that you’ve ever had with anyone. That’s what they offer you. And it’s up to you to realize that and you could. And that’s a hell of a ho ho. That’s a good opportunity, man. You know, even if you’ve been beat around a lot and betrayed and hurt. You’ve got those little kids and they’re thinking, what do you want to do, Dad? You know, and if you’re bitter. That’ll cut you to the quick and you’ll hurt them. You don’t want to do that. So, hey, man, you’re asking the right question, so good luck with it and. Congratulations on your pregnancy or your wife’s pregnancy, because men, by the way, can’t get pregnant.