https://youtubetranscript.com/?v=X_JLCFkh_UA
And so you ask well who’s in charge in a marriage well the light That’s the idea so you come together as one thing you’re no longer two things It isn’t what’s good for you, and it’s not what’s good for your wife It’s what’s good for the marriage and the marriage is about the combined being which is the reassembly of the original hermaphroditic hermaphroditic being at the beginning of time That’s the idea and that’s all packed into like these four sentences And you know there’s been well all of these sentences have tremendous history of interpretation associated with them, right? It’s just endless and endless and endless and that’s one of the lines and so it’s also an Antidote to the idea that women taken out of men which is obviously the reverse of the biological process by the way Makes women in some sense subordinate to man that is not built into this text I don’t see that at all is built into the text and there’s something else that’s associated with it, too and there’s an idea that You know in in in Sleeping Beauty you know Sleeping Beauty goes to sleep and the reason she goes to sleep is because you have to remember what happens is She has parents who are quite old and so they’re pretty desperate to have a child like so many people are now and they only have one child like so many people do now and They don’t want anything to happen to this child because like hey, it’s a miracle and there’s only one of them and so And so she’s the princess and so it’s like we’re not letting anything around her so they have a big christening party, right? And they invite everybody But they don’t invite Maleficent and Maleficent is the terrible mother. She’s nature. She’s like the thing that goes bump in the night She’s the devil herself so to speak she’s everything that you don’t want your child to encounter So the king and queen saying well, we just won’t invite her to the christening. It’s like good luck with that That’s an edible story, right? The edible Mother is the mother who devours her child by refusing by over protecting him or her so that instead of being Strengthened by an encounter with the terrible world They’re weakened by too much protection and then when they’re let out into the world they cannot live and That’s the story of Sleeping Beauty and that’s what the king and queen do and they apologize to the To Maleficent when she first shows up and say well, you know, they have a bunch of half-witted excuses Why they don’t invite her we forgot it’s like I don’t think so You know you don’t forget something like that and she kind of makes that point It’s right the whole horror of life. You don’t forget about that when you have a child That’s for sure you might wish that it would stay at bay But you do not forget about it The question is do you invite it to the party and the answer is it bloody well depends how unconscious you want your child to be And if you want your child to be unconscious Well, then you have the added advantage that maybe they won’t leave home And so you can take advantage of them for the rest of your sad life instead of going off to find something to do Well, and then you of course you can take revenge on them if they do have any any what would you call? Impetus towards courage that you sacrificed yourself 30 years ago and want to stamp out as soon as you see it develop in your child That’s another thing that would be quite pleasant. And so that’s what happens in Sleeping Beauty Yeah, well, none of this is pleasant and nothing that happens in that story is pleasant. So Sleeping Beauty She’s naive as hell They put her out in the forest and have her raised by these three like goody-two-shoes fairies that are also completely dead Of any real potency and power right? There’s no nothing maleficent about them And then the first idiot prince that wanders by she falls in love with so badly that she has post-traumatic stress disorder When he rides off on his horse, right? That’s what happens And then she then she goes into the castle and she’s all freaked out because she met the love of her life for like five minutes For God’s sake and you know, that’s when the spinning wheel That’s the wheel of fate pops up and she pricks her finger, right? They try to get rid of all the spinning wheels They try to get rid of all the wheels of fate with their pointed end But she finds it poke pricks her fingers and finger falls down unconscious Well, she wants to be unconscious and no bloody wonder she was protected her whole life She’s so damn naive that her first love affair just about kills her She wants to go to sleep and never wake up and so that’s exactly what happens And then she has to wait for the prince to come and rescue her Well, you think how sexist can you get that story? Well, seriously because that’s That’s the way that that would be read in the modern world It’s like she doesn’t need a prince to rescue her That’s why Disney made Frozen that absolutely appalling piece of rubbish So, you know, you can say you can say well the princess doesn’t need a prince to rescue her But you know, that’s a boneheaded way of looking at the story because the prince isn’t just a man who’s coming to rescue her The prince isn’t just a man who’s coming to rescue the woman And believe me, he’s got his own problems, right? He’s got a whole goddamn dragon he has to contend with But the prince also represents the woman’s own consciousness The consciousness is presented very frequently in stories as symbolically masculine as it is with the Logos idea And the idea is that without that forward-going courageous consciousness A woman herself will drift into unconsciousness and terror And so you can read it as well the woman who’s sleeping needs a man to wake her up And of course just like a man needs a woman to wake him up It’s the same damn thing That’s the dragon fight in Sleeping Beauty But it’s also the case that if she’s only unconscious all she can do is lay there and sleep Like the sleep of the naive and damned She has to wake herself up and bring her own consciousness Her own masculine consciousness into the forefront so that she can survive in the world And of course women are trying to do that like mad But that’s partly what’s represented in a story like that And that’s partly what’s implicit in this idea is that unless the woman is taken out of man so to speak Then she isn’t a human being, she’s just a creature And that’s partly what’s embedded in this story So you don’t want to read it as a patriarchal You don’t want to read anything that way So really it’s it really it’s yeah I won’t I won’t bother with that But really we can do better than that man Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother and shall cleave unto his wife and they shall be one flesh It’s like yeah Thing the other thing about marriage this is really worth knowing too is that I learned this in part from reading Jung It’s like what do you do when you get married? That’s easy You take someone who’s just as useless and horrible as you are And then you shackle yourself to them And then you say we’re not running away No matter what happens Yeah well that that’s perfect because then you don’t get to run away And the thing is is like if you can run away you can’t tell each other the truth Because if you tell someone the truth about you and they don’t run away they weren’t listening And so if you don’t have someone around that can’t run away then you can’t tell them the truth And so that’s part of the purpose of the marriage it’s like okay okay I’ll bet on you you bet on me it’s a losing bet we both know that but Given our current circumstances we’re unlikely to find anyone better that’s for sure You know There are two things that come off of that one is you know people are waiting around to find Mr Or Mrs. Right it’s like here’s something to think about man to put yourself on your feet right If you went to a party and you found Mr. Right and he looked at you and didn’t run away screaming That would indicate that he wasn’t Mr. Right at all right it’s like the old Nietzschean joke If someone loves you that should immediately disenchant you with them Right right or it’s the Woody Allen joke I never belonged to a club that would take me as a member So so that’s a that’s an interesting that’s a very interesting thing to think about and so you’re going to Shackle yourself to someone who’s just as as imperfect as you are and then the issue is You you you might be in a situation where you can actually negotiate Because you might think well there’s some things about you that aren’t going so right Well there’s some things about you that aren’t going so right and there’s some things about me that aren’t going so right And we’re bloody well stuck with the consequences for the next 50 years So we can we can either straighten this out Or we can suffer through it for the next five decades And you know people are of the sort that without that degree of seriousness those problems will not be solved You’ll leave things unnamed because there’s always an out It’s like and it’s the same thing when you’re living together with someone you know that people who live together Before they’re married are more likely to get divorced not less likely And the reason for that is what exactly are you saying to one another when you live with each other? Just think about it well For now You’re better than anything else I can trick But i’d like to reserve the right to trade you in Conveniently if someone better happens to stumble into me You