https://youtubetranscript.com/?v=1aY49YU8uBQ
Men use the image of female perfection to motivate themselves. And that’s exactly right. That’s precisely what they do. You see that in the Tom Sawyer story. So Tom Sawyer is about 12 years old, and he’s still hanging around with his friends like Huck Finn. And this girl moves across the street, Becky, and she comes out, and he’s struck by her for the first time in his life. Something’s changed. And the first thing he does is hop up on a picket fence, and show off and balance in front of her. And he’s saying, well look at me, look at me. He’s like the male bower bird building something beautiful so the female will approve of it. And it’s motivation. You know, and that’s something that I think modern women don’t really understand about men. They don’t understand that, at least to the degree that males are uncorrupted and not better because of being rejected. They’re doing everything they can to kneel before the eternal image of the feminine. And try to make themselves worthy. That’s the chivalry story, right? That’s what you should encourage in your partner. So, and so out of chaos emerges this first form. It’s the feminine form. It’s partly the form that represents novelty as such. So, and on one hand it’s promise, on the other hand it’s threat. You wouldn’t believe, and I don’t know, because I don’t know, I don’t understand the situation with women as well as I understand the situation with men. Obviously, being a man. But I, I don’t know if women have any idea how paralyzing they are to, especially young men. A very large number of my clinical clients, but also young men I’ve talked to in general, are absolutely terrified of women. Because they’re terrified of being rejected. And the terror exists in precise proportion to the retraction to the woman. Which is a horrible paradoxical situation to be in. It’s often why men make such fools of themselves in front of women that they’re attracted to. It’s because, first of all, they don’t see the woman that they’re attracted to. Because what the hell do they know about her? They don’t see her as an individual. They see her as the manifestation of a judgmental ideal. And then it’s only in establishing the relationship with the actual woman that they can start differentiating between the judgmental ideal and the actual individual woman. And that also requires a sacrifice. And the sacrifice is, you never can have an ideal woman. So to have a relationship with any woman, you have to sacrifice the relationship with the ideal woman. And you have to see the individual woman and separate her from the ideal. And that’s the same thing that happens to the hero in Sleeping Beauty, right? He sees the evil queen who actually turns into the dragon of chaos. And it’s not until he can defeat her that he can establish a relationship with the actual princess. And that’s exactly the case. I had one of my clients who ran this men’s group, which was quite interesting. One of the things they had the initiates do, which was very intelligent, was to go out and ask 50 women in one day for their phone numbers. Why? Plightly, properly, you know. It wasn’t a game, but it wasn’t a stupid game. And the idea was, get over your fear of rejection. And how do you do that? By encountering it continually and continually and continually. So that you’re no longer paralyzed by this.